This Just In - F**k Fox News
You’ll feel better
This just in…
Truth loses, liars win…
As big phat settlement absolves Rupert of his sins.
Insurrections?
No problem!
Caught on tape?
No big deal!
As long as he can write a check,
Anchor hacks can go on lying!
Warning:
Continuing to consume Fox News
May result in rotting brains
Lower IQs
Lonely holidays
And kids who hate you.
But hey, at least you’ll own the libs.
And that’s not all…
You’ll help Russian propagandists earn their annual bonuses!
Be sure to tune in tonight for more Kremlin propaganda!
With your host - Orbán’s favorite dish! - Tucker Carlson!
Who will he be reputation washing tonight?!
Mike Flynn? Yevgeny Prigozhin? Beelzebub?
Whatever rates in the 18 to 89 demo.
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Author Heidi Siegmund Cuda wrote scripts for Fox 11 News for 15 years, and her screenplay Zombie Newsroom skewers local corporate TV news.
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Author’s note: I have been receiving a lot of phone calls asking me about the settlement. I already knew the outcome. Murdoch was mildly inconvenienced after the phone hacks scandal, and within a short period, earnings had tripled. Today, I looked up Fox’s ratings, and they’re soaring.
Truth should matter in America. Integrity should matter in America. But not today. All that matters is an ugly old man who stole our fathers can write a check, and to that I say, fuck Fox News.
Below are links to all my recent Fox News reporting:
I do not accept a fascist America. And I’m guessing you are with me on that.
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Bette Dangerous is a reader-funded magazine. Thank you to all monthly, annual, and founding members. Thank you as well to all those who support my work with your generous coffee tips and who buy my ebooks. A private link to group activist discounts available upon request.
More info about Bette Dangerous - This magazine is written by Heidi Siegmund Cuda, an Emmy-award winning investigative reporter, author, and veteran music and nightlife columnist. She is the cohost of RADICALIZED Truth Survives, an investigative show about disinformation and is part of the Byline Media team. Thank you for your support of independent investigative journalism.
Save the date! The next Bette Dangerous ‘Speakeasy’ Zoom for paid members is Sunday, April 23, 4 pm PT, featuring ‘Pastels and Pedophiles - Inside the Mind of QAnon’ author Dr. Mia Bloom.
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“Something Sacred never dies in almost all of us, who can hear the invitation of Truth…”-words from a Bette Dangerous community member